A Snape in the Pool
by Miss Saigon
Summary: A oneshot inspired by the day we got a snake in our pool, and someone thought I said I'd had a Snape in the pool... pretty silly, really.


**A Snape in the Pool**

It was Amanda Green who found Severus Snape. She had a cold and had managed to milk a second day of sick-leave from her mother, who had decided to go to work despite her daughter's less-than-dire circumstances.

Amanda was in the kitchen, making herself a cup of tea with far too much sugar in it. The sun was beaming down from the cloudless sky; a gorgeous July summer.

She turned to look out of the window and dropped the cup.

The Greens were quite wealthy and they had a swimming pool, for all it was never used: Amanda's two grown-up brothers had long since moved away and Amanda _hated_ swimming. Besides, a back-yard swimming pool in England is a rarity in itself due to the generally cool weather. It wasn't covered, and if not for Mr. Green's meticulous gardening routine, it would have gathered a hefty coating of leaves and other garden rubbish by now.

Right now, there was someone floating in it.

The first thing Amanda did was to reach for the telephone – but she realised as soon as she'd dialled the first two nines that by the time any ambulance could reach him, the man in the pool would have reached a much later stage of death than he was in at the moment. She took the phone with her into the garden.

She opened the separator gate and reached for the long-handled net her father used for scooping up the leaves. Carefully she reached forward, using the net to hook the body and drag it towards her. As she did so she noticed something else floating in the water. It looked like a broomstick that had lost most of its twigs. The man himself was wearing very odd clothes, huge, black and billowing. Some of the boys at her brothers' college wore stuff like that though, so she just filed it away for further consideration.

As soon as the man's clothing came within reach, she grabbed it and hauled with all her strength. He rolled over the edge surprisingly easily. Amanda looked up at his face, both expecting and dreading it to be pale and bloated. It wasn't bloated. The man had a hooked nose, high forehead and long black hair. What a weirdo, she thought.

She felt his skin, fully expecting it to be cold after being in the pool for even a few minutes – the thing may as well have been renamed 'pit of ice' – but it wasn't. It was lukewarm. Full of hope she felt for a pulse. There wasn't one.

She thought back to last year's first aid course and suddenly wished she'd paid any attention.

"Here goes," she told herself. She tipped back the man's head, opened his mouth and breathed into it, hard. Then she pumped her hands on his chest. She couldn't remember how many times you were supposed to do it, so she went for seven. Breath. Seven. Breath. Seven. Breath. Five –

The man coughed and spat up water. Amanda felt her heart jump in her body. _I just saved someone's life! _She helped him to sit up as he coughed spasmodically and spat pool water, which couldn't have tasted nice.

"Are you ok?" she asked him, when she thought he might be done coughing. He didn't answer, but sat staring at his hands, which were shaking. "How'd you get in our pool?"

He looked up at her, with an impolite expression. Two small black eyes glared at her. "I fell," he told her, as if this was obvious.

"Well what were you doing walking around the outside, anyway?" she asked. "The separator's there for a reason, you know." She knocked on the glass beside her, as if to make a point. The man's glare intensified and she realised how stupid she was to be talking to him like this.

_Oh my God, I bet he's a serial rapist. Why didn't my parents ever tell me NOT to rescue strangers from the swimming pool? _

She continued to babble, nonetheless. "There's no need to look at me like that. I did save your life, you might be the least bit grateful."

He seemed quite taken aback by this suggestion. He looked in the pool, and groaned.

"What?" she asked. He ignored her. He reached into the water and pulled out the broomstick handle, which had floated to the edge.

She heard him mutter something like 'knew that bloody broom wouldn't last long…'

"Can I… get you a cup of tea, or something?" she asked, stupidly. "Or I could call an ambulance."

His head whipped round. "No," he snapped. "Foolish girl."

"Well excuse _me _for wanting to help, I'm sure," said Amanda, astonished at the man's rudeness. "Well if you don't want anything I suggest you get off our property before my father realises you're here."

"Gladly," said the man, throwing the remains of the broomstick back into the pool, which was littering, but Amanda didn't feel inclined to argue. She led him to the side gate, which he walked through without a second glance at her. She watched as he sauntered wetly down the drive and turned a corner.

_Well,_ she thought. _There's no way Mum and Dad are going to believe this…_

OOO

Severus Snape stopped and fumbling in his soaked robe for his wand. As he raised it, he realised suddenly that he really should have obliviated that Muggle girl… but decided that he had bigger worries, and Apparated.


End file.
